Once you see the problem, you can eradicate it.

I created this myself. I chose to allow this to happen. I remember allowing myself to have the first one.

I will destroy this.

Whatever I create, I can destroy.

I thought it was about mending something that had broken. No. This has been habit. The habit has been created, therefore it can be destroyed.

I am the only person in the world with the power to destroy all my panic.

I will be sat on a train in 9 hours. I will ride a few stops. I can do it.

I will be getting further away from my comfort zone which ends somewhere near the back of Ampthill.

Step One. Bedford to Flitwick.

If I feel the panic coming, I will destroy it.

There is no panic. It is fear of fear. Remove the fear + there is no panic. Indefinitely.

I don't know if it will be easy. I don't know if it will be a nightmare.

In essence, there are a few things I already know from panic which I do not need to fear.

1. I will not die.
2. I will not pass out.

My head might want to make me think that something bad is around the corner.

No. I refuse to allow this. If I feel it coming, I will control it. I will shape the fear into the worst panic attack I could possibly imagine.

I am ready for this.

Then we laugh it off.

Transcend the fear. Control, mould + shape it how I wish. Destroy it at its beginnings.

My head cannot hold me prisoner anymore.

I've red + been told so much rubbish about panic, it's been difficult to focus.

In the last few days, I've become optimistic. Yesterday, 'when I am fixed'. This morning; 'soon', this afternoon; 'next week', now: tomorrow.

I will get on a train tomorrow.

Step one. However bad it's been, that's as bad as it ever got.

No, I'm not mad, but this truly is all in the head.